04-01-2020, 11:00 PM
I found this very powerful and raw. The last stanza was excellent and brought it together. I appreciate the simplicity of it and adds to its relatable loss.
The first two stanzas could be combined.
Suggestion:
Last week I saw the container
holding your blueberries.
Only a shriveled handful left
I couldn't throw them out.
Yesterday, our son came by.
He cleaned the fridge.
He filled it with foods
he knows I'll eat.
I open and close it,
and open it again,
but I just don’t see
the only thing I want.
The first two stanzas could be combined.
Suggestion:
Last week I saw the container
holding your blueberries.
Only a shriveled handful left
I couldn't throw them out.
Yesterday, our son came by.
He cleaned the fridge.
He filled it with foods
he knows I'll eat.
I open and close it,
and open it again,
but I just don’t see
the only thing I want.

