12-30-2019, 09:23 PM
There's only one spot I struggled with here and that is
"Attached by birth to burial/ ground, fragile memorials" that break between burial and grounds throws me off a bit. I think you could change it to "attached by birth/ to burial grounds, fragile memorials" or to "attached by birth to burial grounds/ fragile memorials". Personally I like the second better as it let's fragile memorials sit on it's own which gives it it's own weight.
"Attached by birth to burial/ ground, fragile memorials" that break between burial and grounds throws me off a bit. I think you could change it to "attached by birth/ to burial grounds, fragile memorials" or to "attached by birth to burial grounds/ fragile memorials". Personally I like the second better as it let's fragile memorials sit on it's own which gives it it's own weight.