12-24-2019, 02:24 AM
Hello,
I am curious if you have tried writing without rhyming.
I think the poem can be more succinct, Especially the second stanza where 'think'/'thinking about', 'wondering if she's thinking about you' is recurring. Maybe use variations of the word 'think', such as 'pine' or 'reminisce'
The title 'Lover's Quarrel' tells me there are darker, deeper sentiments and experiences that happened that you do not reveal in your poem. Adding another dimension could give your poem more depth.
Thank you for sharing.
I am curious if you have tried writing without rhyming.
I think the poem can be more succinct, Especially the second stanza where 'think'/'thinking about', 'wondering if she's thinking about you' is recurring. Maybe use variations of the word 'think', such as 'pine' or 'reminisce'
The title 'Lover's Quarrel' tells me there are darker, deeper sentiments and experiences that happened that you do not reveal in your poem. Adding another dimension could give your poem more depth.
Thank you for sharing.