12-01-2019, 03:04 AM
A whisper in the wind,
A light in the the night,
Every time you smile my world gets so bright,
As endless as the ocean,
As potent as a potion,
Your love drives my every single motion,
Until time has ceased,
Or my soul is leased,
My love for you will never end.
I often wonder if you think about me,
I think of you as I lay in bed,
Every time I’m around you I overthink on what I said,
Did you understand that I was kidding, and what I said was just a joke,
Do you know that I think you’re amazing and not like normal folk,
You’re so confident and outgoing, bright and so bubbly,
Do you enjoy my company even though I’m a bit stubbly,
You give me hope, we do our dance, the game seems to be in play,
But you cause me to think too much when you’re cold to me the next day,
What did I do, what is the problem, how do I fix what we were,
I just want what we had that causes my heart to stir,
I wonder if you think about me ever or at all,
Truth be told I wrote this poem because I know I stall.
I took the liberty of correcting the font display issues, hopefully it’s what you intended and I didn’t introduce new errors. Unrequited love is of course a very common theme because it’s so powerful and we’ve all been there. With that said some of the rhymes are a little forced. Bubbly/Stubbly, for example. You refer to the game in play, more about that. There’s also a mention of a joke misunderstood. It introduces tension clarifying that could make it stronger. Also, can you include positive interaction between the two of you, so it feels more like a relationship. Hope that’s helpful. For some reason when I think of unrequited love I think of Billy Bragg. He was very poignant and gave a picture of the relationship and it’s limits. Here’s one: https://songmeanings.com/songs/view/3530...859045600/
A light in the the night,
Every time you smile my world gets so bright,
As endless as the ocean,
As potent as a potion,
Your love drives my every single motion,
Until time has ceased,
Or my soul is leased,
My love for you will never end.
I often wonder if you think about me,
I think of you as I lay in bed,
Every time I’m around you I overthink on what I said,
Did you understand that I was kidding, and what I said was just a joke,
Do you know that I think you’re amazing and not like normal folk,
You’re so confident and outgoing, bright and so bubbly,
Do you enjoy my company even though I’m a bit stubbly,
You give me hope, we do our dance, the game seems to be in play,
But you cause me to think too much when you’re cold to me the next day,
What did I do, what is the problem, how do I fix what we were,
I just want what we had that causes my heart to stir,
I wonder if you think about me ever or at all,
Truth be told I wrote this poem because I know I stall.
I took the liberty of correcting the font display issues, hopefully it’s what you intended and I didn’t introduce new errors. Unrequited love is of course a very common theme because it’s so powerful and we’ve all been there. With that said some of the rhymes are a little forced. Bubbly/Stubbly, for example. You refer to the game in play, more about that. There’s also a mention of a joke misunderstood. It introduces tension clarifying that could make it stronger. Also, can you include positive interaction between the two of you, so it feels more like a relationship. Hope that’s helpful. For some reason when I think of unrequited love I think of Billy Bragg. He was very poignant and gave a picture of the relationship and it’s limits. Here’s one: https://songmeanings.com/songs/view/3530...859045600/