10-18-2019, 08:36 PM
It definitely sounds good, the rhyme scheme gives off a very sophisticated elegance that I really enjoy, some may say that is to much rhyme but If you do it well, it could be great. Moreover, you wrote some very powerful lines that I really liked like "I moonlight the night", good imagery that of yourself transforming into the moon and lighting the night. Also interesting points that of "quit my day job for a pun" and "my mother taught me well, so I rebel", it seems an original way to say it. I have to say that I like almost every line of the poem, so good job, I am not at all an expert critic, but I honestly have to say that I usually don´t like most poems I read and I really liked this one.