Comparing - edit

[dukealien]

edit1;

When I was soldiering, commanders said,
“Never compare your paycheck with the guy
who’s sitting next to you.” They meant he might
have less deducted, alimony, tax,
more time in grade, years prior service, or
incentive pay for special skills he’d learned.
Since inequality seeds envy, they,
with discipline and unity in mind,
suggested we stay ignorant and blind.

That’s long ago, but once you set aside
Command’s self-serving motives, there remains
a core of wisdom in that sage advice
because no-one gets just what he deserves–
not sunny days or friendship, joy or fame,
not suffering, dismissal, pain, or grief
get added up by some celestial clerk;
our acts don’t spin a giant cosmic wheel
that brings around comeuppance or reward.

So as you stand beside my bier don’t try
comparing all you have with what I got.
Our pay stubs will be equal when we’re done:
for item, “Lives,” our numbers will be “one.”

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Thanks to both critics.  I've tried to use as much of the advice as possible while maintaining blank verse (aside from a couple of rhymes).

In particular, I tried to change highfalutin language to make the voice more consistent.  "Bier" remains; could be "slab," I guess.

Jargon:  "time in grade" is how long you've been a particular grade (such as captain or tech sergeant) while "prior service" would be time outside the present branch or structure, for example a captain who was enlisted (a sergenat) before being commissioned as an officer so would be paid more than a captain with the same number of years as a captain.  It also works the other way (a sergeant who was demoted from captain) and crosswise - an Army sergeant who was previously in the Navy.  You meet all kinds.  "Hazardous duty incentive pay" is an extra allowance from volunteering for more dangerous assignments.  There are also myriad other incentives, such as for doctors and other specialties which are uniquely valuable; drone operator is one, or should be.