Second poem, more poemy

[UselessBlueprint]

Sharp


he pulls a knife

my life in his hands

my fists clenched
no defence

cuts deep
repeats

my blood flows
till he cauterizes and sews

dermatologist

So the main issue here is that the wording borders on cliche. You've got the right idea on including a bit more imagery and the like, focusing on a scene and executing it.
Unfortunately, the first three lines are very typical, to say the least. This is where simile and metaphor help to make an image both clear and condensed, while avoiding the mundane expressions that we often use "poetically."
There's not a whole lot else to say here. The execution is quick and concise, so no trimming is needed, but the bones lack meat. I see the skeleton of a poem, but nothing to chew on. Now fitting the two together can be difficult and takes practice, but you should practice that kind of thing now, because it will take a lot of failed attempts before you can make a poem that has a solid structure to hold it up, but also has the meaty metaphors that readers like to read again and again.



Side note: I also recommend making the title of your poem and post the same. It's an organizational thing that helps keep the main boards easy to read and use.