Contra Ayn Rand - Edit3

[billy]

hi duke. i could never read atlas shrugged, i made it to about page twenty.  this on the other hand i like. at first glance it oozes objectivision {re ayn rand} but after a couple of reads it changes to subjectivity.  [of course that could just be my take on it] and becomes contra as stated in the title to her philosophy. not sure i'd cut anything bar the opening line. it takes a read or two to work through the line breaks but is well worth it. in it's own way it has a structure to to it as strong as that of Rand's own philosophy. just opposite in thought.

Contra Ayn Rand


One thing no needs for this line, without it the opening become stronger
origami teaches,
    more than skill of fingers,
    memory, and seeing in a thing
    itself turned inside-out,
    implicit possibilities
    of material unformed these two lines are perfectly matched to the title.

is,
    having folded one’s own labor,
    time, and vision intricately
    into matter, making it one’s own–

to loose it freely
onto river, wind or fire, personally i'd have used into
dispossessed without regret.

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This started simpler, and I have the sense that it's become over-elaborated.  Advice on how/where to cut or simplify particularly welcome.