First Edit: My Apologies

[Knot]

Hi Richard.

My Apologies
nice title.

I'm sorry, but I was distracted by poetry.
I think L2 should flow directly out of L1
(no period after 'poetry')
or L2 should begin 'So our...'
Our first kiss tasted red,
lips soft as overripe strawberries.
The 'our first kiss' seems to refer
to the same person as 'you were born'
- is this intentional?
When you were born, I fixated
on the rose petals and other broken flora
that fell from your mother.
My friend's fifth drink that night a flag,
should 'flag' be 'Flag'?.
It's a bit of a awkward sentence,
and you follow 'friend's' with 'father's'
just a suggestion;
For his fifth drink, my friend drank a flag
each sip rising it to half mast.
Overall, I don't think the 'friend' section
adds much, you might consider cutting it.
Next to my father's bed, I waited
to catch death with dirty hands,
tiptoeing out the back door.
very nice.
I'm sorry, but I was distracted by poetry.
perhaps switch this around,
but I was distracted, by poetry. I'm sorry. ?
(I'm doing it again)


Enjoyed the read.

Best, Knot.