NaPM April 13, 2018

NaPM April 13, 2018

Lizzie Offline

Exalted Otter

Posts: 598
Threads: 83
Joined: Apr 2016

#12

04-14-2018, 02:42 PM

(04-14-2018, 12:00 AM)Todd Wrote: Look, Up in the Sky

that’s why even though I can see
the wing on a fly across the yard,
he has me wear glasses.

It's striking the difference between "I have to wear glasses" and "he has me wear glasses." Little tweaks with big implications.

A keeper.

(04-14-2018, 10:58 AM)Richard Wrote: Love this Lizzie. The last line is especially effective, and I love how used "waxen". Nice work

Gracias.

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Messages In This Thread

NaPM April 13, 2018 - by Todd - 04-13-2018, 12:30 PM

RE: NaPM April 13, 2018 - by Knot - 04-13-2018, 11:32 PM

RE: NaPM April 13, 2018 - by Todd - 04-14-2018, 12:00 AM

RE: NaPM April 13, 2018 - by Lizzie - 04-14-2018, 02:42 PM

RE: NaPM April 13, 2018 - by Keith - 04-23-2018, 06:03 AM

RE: NaPM April 13, 2018 - by cloud - 04-14-2018, 04:07 AM

RE: NaPM April 13, 2018 - by just mercedes - 04-14-2018, 09:06 AM

RE: NaPM April 13, 2018 - by Keith - 04-17-2018, 03:39 AM

RE: NaPM April 13, 2018 - by Keith - 04-18-2018, 01:23 AM

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