|
Mental Block
|
03-25-2018, 09:57 AM
I quite like what you did with making each line shorter to drive home the point of time running out. One suggestion could be to separate the last few lines into new stanzas, or to have each line be a new letter, to really drive the point home. (This is my first critique though, so take anything I say with a grain of salt)
|
|
« Next Oldest | Next Newest »
|
| Messages In This Thread |
|
Mental Block - by flagthrower - 12-11-2017, 03:49 PM
RE: Mental Block - by Keith - 12-11-2017, 10:10 PM
RE: Mental Block - by vagabond - 12-11-2017, 10:12 PM
RE: Mental Block - by flagthrower - 12-12-2017, 07:39 AM
RE: Mental Block - by flowerburgers - 12-15-2017, 03:55 AM
RE: Mental Block - by nibbed - 12-15-2017, 06:23 AM
RE: Mental Block - by Lavieboheme - 12-15-2017, 08:55 AM
RE: Mental Block - by Joseph918 - 12-21-2017, 05:49 PM
RE: Mental Block - by chopblock - 12-24-2017, 12:55 PM
RE: Mental Block - by AndyBryant123 - 03-01-2018, 09:42 AM
RE: Mental Block - by Eat.think.live.peaceful - 03-01-2018, 11:00 AM
RE: Mental Block - by Trophic_Cascade - 03-04-2018, 04:53 PM
RE: Mental Block - by Silfan - 03-04-2018, 07:49 PM
RE: Mental Block - by Lorvick - 03-08-2018, 10:45 AM
RE: Mental Block - by zwubz - 03-19-2018, 01:29 PM
RE: Mental Block - by SpaceDirt - 03-25-2018, 09:57 AM
RE: Mental Block - by kaos - 03-27-2018, 03:37 PM
|
