Push
#21
(11-14-2017, 10:39 AM)Persadia Wrote:  Push

Curl up

Protect yourself
Your head
Your Heart
your Being


The onslaught

Push forward
one step


Each moment a lost one

Nothing to sink into
Nothing to become


The torrent continues

Breathe.  Recall the Reason

But death, ever present.  cutting

Each moment a thief
stealing your soul
steeling your soul
I Like this poem. I get the impression, from reading this, of repression. Of being pushed down. As if the authors limbs are weighted. Of moving underwater. I think there is a lot of good material to work with. As a constructive criticism, I thought there should be more use of simile. I liked the ending. The idea that it ends on, what could be considered a positive note.
Be yourself; everyone else is already taken

Oscar Wilde
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Messages In This Thread
Push - by Persadia - 11-14-2017, 10:39 AM
RE: Push - by Lizzie - 11-14-2017, 10:57 AM
RE: Push - by vagabond - 11-15-2017, 01:13 AM
RE: Push - by alonso ramoran - 11-15-2017, 05:34 AM
RE: Push - by homer1950 - 11-15-2017, 05:42 AM
RE: Push - by bloated_corpse - 11-15-2017, 05:58 AM
RE: Push - by Persadia - 11-16-2017, 01:17 AM
RE: Push - by vagabond - 11-16-2017, 06:32 AM
RE: Push - by Lizzie - 11-16-2017, 02:25 AM
RE: Push - by nibbed - 11-16-2017, 03:33 AM
RE: Push - by tony3 - 11-17-2017, 07:12 AM
RE: Push - by Achebe - 11-17-2017, 09:12 AM
RE: Push - by GVBOY1966 - 11-28-2017, 03:59 PM
RE: Push - by Bloodline - 11-30-2017, 08:03 PM
RE: Push - by Mopkins - 12-04-2017, 09:35 PM
RE: Push - by Psychonyxx - 12-05-2017, 06:53 AM
RE: Push - by Rorf Asalis - 12-16-2017, 03:22 AM
RE: Push - by ritwiksadhu33 - 01-27-2018, 04:18 AM
RE: Push - by therabbitisme - 01-30-2018, 06:35 AM
RE: Push - by gconrad - 02-13-2018, 12:14 AM
RE: Push - by moot - 02-25-2018, 10:39 PM



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