Conscious Disregard

[Thunderembargo]

These words supreme to me
floss my effervescence,
      which of the spirit
      trickles over
      begone from reality.

Contained only by pillars,
while annealed in distant hills
that call the mockingjay,
      to seek refuge
      beneath its wings
      of endless comforting.

Ponderous deeds deny me,
from these knolls of earth
and strands of green;
      unfulfilled verses
      expose,

these words supreme to me.

Enough...this is contrived nonsense. If English is not your first language then I apologise. If it is, then YOU should apologise for time wasting. PM me if you want to discuss this further...we do not have a forum for computer algorhymes but. I am inclined to move it to somewhere else. Please tell me why I should not. Mod.

This criticism is bogus

Please refrain from critiquing another member's critique. Just write your own, as you did below, and it will be clear that you perceive the poem differently. /admin

On second look, tectak's is not a critique, it's a mod note. Again, this thread is not the place for your response, if you'd like to discuss it the Pig's Arse would be the place to do it.

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These words supreme to me
parade an effervescence,
      which of the spirit
      trickles over
      begone from reality.           a complete transcendence and confidence in the power of your own words, to evoke a champagne of success in imaginary construction

Repressed by pillars,
whilst annealed in hills
that call the mockingjay,
      to seek refuge
      beneath its wings
      of endless comforting.             the contrast between tension/structure/andbeauty is a demonstration of movement as it conforms to the laws of nature's supernatural

Ponderous deeds deny me,
from these knolls of earth
and strands of green;
      unfulfilled verses
      expose,                               this verse is more difficult, yet moves the thinker or pensive towards the ground, a final direction of humility to make the poem sublimity

these words supreme to me.

First I really must comment on the flouorishing and brightness of this poem.   It is triumphant and victorious and gloiriol.   Many thanks for your accomplishment.