Ere the Err of the Ewe -edited

[yimbus]

Spiraling towards efficiency
the simpleton vanished.
And rich atrocities
had a devious tendency 
to crumble amongst the bushes,
while a predicament flows by.

To lie and weep
some type of sublime cry,
as ignorant modernities
failed to appease,
my vagabond sense of despondency.

Still I tended my ewe
ere she disappeared my view,
granted to greener pastures 
as greenest surely can’t exist
within these bound’ries reminisced


Original:

Spiraling towards efficiency
The grey sweater vanished,
Yet err had a tendency
To crumble amongst the bushes,
While a predicament flows by;
To lie and weep
Some type of sublime cry,
While I tended my ewe
Ere they disappeared my view,
Granted to greener pastures
As greenest cannot exist,
Within these boundaries reminisced.