These distant mountains speak

These distant mountains speak

yimbus Offline

member

Posts: 27
Threads: 5
Joined: Jan 2018

#12

01-26-2018, 11:00 AM

It has some good imagery, but I would try to work on the vocab and flow a bit. Exclude unnecessary words and finding more poetic words to describe imagery helps with the tone you want to set. I think the second stanza is fairly good. I think the first one doesn’t flow well and the last is somewhat inconclusive

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Messages In This Thread

These distant mountains speak - by Hannah - 01-02-2018, 05:05 AM

RE: These distant mountains speak - by vagabond - 01-02-2018, 05:53 AM

RE: These distant mountains speak - by Hannah - 01-02-2018, 08:04 AM

RE: These distant mountains speak - by Todd - 01-02-2018, 11:57 PM

RE: These distant mountains speak - by ArtyFl - 01-04-2018, 07:06 AM

RE: These distant mountains speak - by Kaily Bear - 01-09-2018, 01:50 PM

RE: These distant mountains speak - by nibbed - 01-09-2018, 03:35 PM

RE: These distant mountains speak - by solitarysoul - 01-13-2018, 09:28 PM

RE: These distant mountains speak - by Estefanie.V - 01-16-2018, 06:20 AM

RE: These distant mountains speak - by tryingtobeme - 01-16-2018, 01:00 PM