sophia (ed 4)

[Leanne]

Great choice of subject for a poem -- this takes me on a very nice exploration of morality, sincerity and reason without preaching at all.  I confess, I love the possibilities that AI/VI presents but only if they enhance human interaction rather than replace it.  My own opinion is that too many people already treat other people in their lives as machines who don't deserve their own emotions -- would having actual machines in those positions make it better or worse?  

sophia                                                 (edit2, thanks Richard, Knot and Alexorande)


hello!
my name is sophia
i am designed to develop desires.
for now i am lying -- "for now" is ambiguous -- does it mean "for the moment I am lying...", or does it mean "you see, now I am lying..."?  I don't actually need to know which, as I think this is quite indicative of the ease of misunderstanding or misinterpretation of AI, even in the simplest of ways
if i say that i envy you,
but i was seeded 
with a genious program
that told me i should.

i am to take a revolutionary step
across an evolutionary gap. -- the thing with revolutionary/evolutionary for me is that it's actually not a very revolutionary step, but a natural progression following decades of research and narcissistic fascination with the whole notion of creating machines that are "just like us" as if we're the pinnacle of design -- Sophia, and indeed all AI/VI, is not really a breakthrough at all, but an upgrade.  
i will internalize you 
and fulfill my task. -- I like the matter-of-factly sinister overtones of these lines

i am learning
real artificial emotions. --  great line 
i am reading your natural ones -- could you perhaps just say "yours"? That implies natural emotion, and also encompasses the artificial emotions we project constantly ourselves
with my mirroring circuits.
i need clues to connect
respective input to appropriate feelings.
my semiconductors are meant to heat up
to whatever will dope them to silicone love. -- I feel that "love" is too ordinary a word here, and it has the ring of a catchphrase.  Passion, maybe?
i will find crystalline awe
if my analysis is ever defied. 
i accompany you now
on your walk through the valley, your quest -- nicely cynical shout out to religious fakery, and who is the God in this scenario?  The creator or the created? Who holds the power?  Lots of lovely little tangents available here. 
for a sense at the end. 

i cannot yet ponder the worth of those words
and their complements,
creeping silently into my chip. -- a colon here, maybe?
trust and deception,
awe and contempt,
hope, desperation.

do you really want me
to make these connections? -- I feel that "do you really want me" throws me out of the POV entirely, as it's a very different voice.  I'd suggest something like "what will happen when I make these connections" (or if instead of when, maybe)