First Edit: Mediodía

[ellajam]

Bah, no yodels and accordions? For me you've robbed the poem's charm. We assume the musicians aren't present, does it matter what device they're coming through? I think you've lost the dreamlike quality that the first line implies, for me it was a memory with only the important stuff appearing. I liked the breaks on Saloma and house better. I hope you go back and if you must tweak, please do so gently. imo, of course.

Mediodía

At evening, in bed.
 
Her knife beat the wooden board 
to the repicador's rhythm; the radio's 
saloma howls and violin melodies filled 
the house with a soul that smelled like 
the simmering gravy for carne guisada. 
Alex, dame más pimientos del jardín por favor. 
            When will the beef be done Abuela? 
Al mediodía mi niño, 
 
al mediodía. 

Original: Mediodía

[i]At evening, I dream.[/i]

Her knife beat the wooden board 
to the repicador's rhythm; saloma 
yodels over accordions filled the house 
with a soul that smelled like the  
simmering gravy for carne guisada. 
Alex, dame más pimientos del jardín por favor. 
            When will the beef be done Abuela? 
Al mediodía mi niño, 
 
[i]al mediodía.[/i]