Third Draft: Sleepless

[Knot]

Hi Richard,
A few thoughts on the second draft:

Sleepless

Eye-lids offer soft darkness,              - perhaps 'bring' for offer?
at best, a failed distraction.               - Not really sure what purpose the first two lines serve.
You can't stop thinking                     - line break here
of your son's plush bear,
the one he never plays with.

Then your panic wakes up,
pushes you out of bed-                     - without the spoiler 'panic' just seems an overreaction.
Did you buy more of his favorite crackers?
He won't eat anything else for breakfast.

Night was once welcomed.               - Why was night 'once welcomed' and what has changed?
The stars were happy dreamers,       - the switch to a more 'poetical' language is rather jarring.
but now they are additional gawkers - in addition to what/whom?
who watch his tip-toe walk.

Given the explanation you provide in the spoiler,
there doesn't seem to be sufficient here to distinguish
this worried parent/child relationship from any other
(lots of kids are 'fussy eaters', for instance).
I'm afraid I agree with Keith about this piece.

Best, Knot.