Lost love

[GrassRoots77]

Don’t make a noise, don’t break a stick, What kind of stick? Give more detail unless you are trying to keep the reader guessing.
A candle without a wick;
Go silently their way along, Who? and maybe switch "way along" to "along the way"
Days are so short, nights are so long. Add a comma instead of a period 
Does it matter when hope is gone Add a question mark
For those willing to be bygone? In my opinion take out this line
Nights are too bright, life is too thick; Add color how bright? A neon yellow or a dull yellow?
There are men who just never sleep. Add women as well or just say people.
 
Their tearless eyes looking aghast, Their tearless desert like eyes looking aghast.
Knight defending the last turret, 
Butterflies lost in the desert, I like this cause you normally wouldn't put butterflies and desert together.
Princes of ephemeral past,
They freeze at the Lilliputian
Miserly sight of the ocean, Again add detail. Is it calm, dangerous, blue or black clear or murky.
Its nights too bright, its life so thick,
There are men who just never sleep. Good use of repetition.
 
There once was a mighty princess, Seems like this whole stanza doesn't belong.
An Eldorado, a bright star, A shining star
Her orbit turned them to ageless,
A wreck, a nothing, a sandbar,  
A light house that in the dark
Dreams of sailing home the lost ark.
Nights are too bright, life is a blight;
There are men just waiting to die.