First Edit: Ghost Story

[CRNDLSM]

Ghost Story

I have seen those who exclaim passion
like a poltergeist shakes its chain. From what I understand, it takes en exceptional amount of supernatural energy for a ghost to interact with the living.  The chain shaking brings to mind Scrooge which could be cliche or dampen the suspense

Their words fistless pounding word's works or restructure the sentencing to not want verbs, 
one is best to ignore. I don't like referring to people as one if I can't help it, and this might be too arguable an opinion, best to ignore
Their actions composed of blood
that eventually disappears.i like this one 
Their motive a dead child
who wanders an empty hall this one too
in search of heaven. Debatable with ghosts too, kinda dampens the suspense.  I really like comparing the passionate speakers with ghosts that come and go.  Just picturing month pythons Life Of Brian the square with the preachers shouting and the camera just pans past cause it's all just mumbo to the plot

I have seen these phantoms
fade away in daylight,
never to haunt me again. I don't like the last line, your memory relating this story is almost like they are still haunting you.

Don't know if it helps I'm trying to get back into critiquing and thought intensive would force the focus.