10-15-2017, 05:29 AM
Third Draft:
Sleepless
Night was once welcomed.
Stars were happy dreamers
instead of additional onlookers,
politely silent about his tip-toe walk.
Darkness feels surgically attached
to my eyelids.
Rest
a specialist
reluctant
to make a diagnosis.
Why can't I stop thinking about his plush bear,
the one he never plays with?
Panic shoves me from bed-
Did you buy more of his favorite crackers?
He won't eat anything else for breakfast.
Silence answers
using the same tone
as when it speaks for him
daily.
Second Draft:
Sleepless
Eye-lids offer soft darkness,
at best, a failed distraction.
You can't stop thinking of your son's plush bear,
the one he never plays with.
Then your panic wakes up,
pushes you out of bed-
Did you buy more of his favorite crackers?
He won't eat anything else for breakfast.
Silence answers, using the same tone
as when it speaks for him.
Night was once welcomed.
The stars were happy dreamers,
but now they are additional gawkers
who watch his tip-toe walk.
First Draft:
Sleepless
Eye-lids give soft darkness,
looking too long is a failed distraction.
You can't stop thinking of your son's plush bear,
the one he never plays with.
Then you panic,
force your eyes open,
did you buy more of his favorite crackers?
He won't eat anything else for breakfast.
Night was once welcomed.
The stars were happy dreamers,
but now they are additional eyes
that stare at his tip-toe walk.
Original:
Sleepless
Eyes closed,
eye-lids give soft darkness.
Looking too long
reminds you of your son's plush rabbit,
the one he never plays with.
Eyes open,
the ceiling is an indifferent white
like the inside of an eye
not focused on you.
Where are his favorite crackers,
the ones he always eats for breakfast?
Night was once welcomed.
The stars were happy dreamers,
but now they are additional eyes
that stare at his tip-toe walk.
Sleepless
Night was once welcomed.
Stars were happy dreamers
instead of additional onlookers,
politely silent about his tip-toe walk.
Darkness feels surgically attached
to my eyelids.
Rest
a specialist
reluctant
to make a diagnosis.
Why can't I stop thinking about his plush bear,
the one he never plays with?
Panic shoves me from bed-
Did you buy more of his favorite crackers?
He won't eat anything else for breakfast.
Silence answers
using the same tone
as when it speaks for him
daily.
Second Draft:
Sleepless
Eye-lids offer soft darkness,
at best, a failed distraction.
You can't stop thinking of your son's plush bear,
the one he never plays with.
Then your panic wakes up,
pushes you out of bed-
Did you buy more of his favorite crackers?
He won't eat anything else for breakfast.
Silence answers, using the same tone
as when it speaks for him.
Night was once welcomed.
The stars were happy dreamers,
but now they are additional gawkers
who watch his tip-toe walk.
First Draft:
Sleepless
Eye-lids give soft darkness,
looking too long is a failed distraction.
You can't stop thinking of your son's plush bear,
the one he never plays with.
Then you panic,
force your eyes open,
did you buy more of his favorite crackers?
He won't eat anything else for breakfast.
Night was once welcomed.
The stars were happy dreamers,
but now they are additional eyes
that stare at his tip-toe walk.
Original:
Sleepless
Eyes closed,
eye-lids give soft darkness.
Looking too long
reminds you of your son's plush rabbit,
the one he never plays with.
Eyes open,
the ceiling is an indifferent white
like the inside of an eye
not focused on you.
Where are his favorite crackers,
the ones he always eats for breakfast?
Night was once welcomed.
The stars were happy dreamers,
but now they are additional eyes
that stare at his tip-toe walk.
Time is the best editor.