Trapped - Edit
#7
(09-25-2017, 10:34 PM)dukealien Wrote:  Thanks to all commenters!

@billy - Good point.  "Caught" as title, or on L4?  L4, I think, to click with "quivering."

@Rivernotch - End of line punctuation is among my many weaknesses, particularly in free verse.  Have to try some exercises...


Code:
You like
you like,
you like.
You like?
You like...
you like --
you like!

Was thinking of "caught" when I first read it. The C and Q would play off each other nicely. Better placed in L4 than the title IMO.

@rayheinrich - Am I mystified, or being lightly doxxed?  Those two digits *do* appear on my car's licen(s/c)e plates - and in that exact order!  *shudder*
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Messages In This Thread
Trapped - Edit - by dukealien - 09-25-2017, 05:32 AM
RE: Trapped - by just mercedes - 09-25-2017, 12:02 PM
RE: Trapped - by billy - 09-25-2017, 04:31 PM
RE: Trapped - by RiverNotch - 09-25-2017, 04:53 PM
RE: Trapped - by rayheinrich - 09-25-2017, 08:09 PM
RE: Trapped - by dukealien - 09-25-2017, 10:34 PM
RE: Trapped - by Tiger the Lion - 09-25-2017, 10:53 PM
RE: Trapped - by Todd - 09-25-2017, 11:08 PM
RE: Trapped - by rayheinrich - 09-26-2017, 01:53 AM
RE: Trapped - Edit - by dukealien - 09-26-2017, 12:48 PM
RE: Trapped - Edit - by rayheinrich - 09-27-2017, 08:06 PM
RE: Trapped - Edit - by Keith - 09-27-2017, 06:51 AM



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