Sonnet "Mayapple Flower"

[alatos]

Beneath the twin umbrella leaves that fold
with gentle curvature like praying hands,
hides a single flower, white and gold, missing first syllable - "there" would be insipid, perhaps 2-syllable replacement for "hides?"
like shreds of linen in Egyptian sands -
a mystery - the prelude to a treasure.
Approach its beauty like a priest in the night - extra syllable at "the" - conventional to replace "in the" with "at," need something better for "at night"
a priest who serves the doleful goddess Pleasure -
and kneel to see the blooming gold and white,
a living jewel fed by the ancient root,  always a little trouble with words like "jewel" used, as here, as one syllable.   Could removing "the" let it be two, accented per meter?
and shrouded by the two dark-spreading veils.
In time, the flower will become a fruit.
But it is dark, and you’ll  forget these trails
(although you whisper now that you will not).
The blissful gem will ripen, fall, and rot.

In general, since images are important here, you might consider replacing almost every use of "the" with a more descriptive word matched to the image in progress.  Even just replacing with "its" or "a" reserves "the" for cases where there is only one and the singularity is important.

That said, the rhymes are exact and suitable; the turn begins a bit early (in L12).  In fact, the turn as L12-13 seems a sufficient contrast to me; perhaps they can extend (with suitable editing) to L14.  Is L14 actually necessary after L11-12?

Intriguing use of the Shakespearean form, and romantic in its way.

Thanks for the feedback! While I do really appreciate the time you took, I'm really focusing more on five stresses than five iambs. I realize this isn't traditional English form, but I am starting to warm to it. Gives a little room for natural speech in an otherwise rigid format, in my opinion. Like I said though, I'm not trying to discount your critique. I do appreciate the time, and I should have clarified that I was not sticking to strictly iambs!