08-12-2017, 02:56 PM
"Lost in this melodic trance,
my gaze drifts lazily down.
I let it follow a languid leaf,
as it spirals to the ground."
hello, i think this stanza is one of the most beautiful. it places a reflection that eases a kind of languid break in the whole poem, transferring the reader into a one on one exposition. overall its pleasant, marking tendencies very relatable in each of us but also gleaming with your own musk.
choice of words are always a tussle, many sounding oblique and general. but also with this i think it is important as much of the time readers have to fill their own shelves and not just accumulate the whole poem into their definition.
anyway, i appreciate the thread
my gaze drifts lazily down.
I let it follow a languid leaf,
as it spirals to the ground."
hello, i think this stanza is one of the most beautiful. it places a reflection that eases a kind of languid break in the whole poem, transferring the reader into a one on one exposition. overall its pleasant, marking tendencies very relatable in each of us but also gleaming with your own musk.
choice of words are always a tussle, many sounding oblique and general. but also with this i think it is important as much of the time readers have to fill their own shelves and not just accumulate the whole poem into their definition.
anyway, i appreciate the thread