Shudder in your clogs

[Achebe]

I know you wrote a parody
aimed at someone in particular -
I'm not naming names, but it's me.
So even though my inflamed articular

bones cry arthritis, the August cold worsens
my sinusitis, I'll open my dictionary
of rhymes, and let it rip, like the Saracens
in Palermo, Amalfi, or Bari - 

mangiaremo tuo pranzo - 
I might have the wrong dictionary
but I've started already - 
o non mi chiami Alfonso.
I have a hunch that I just asked you out to lunch,
but what I meant was that I'll have my revenge
in this life or the next - 
it's called inter-reading the text.

Now having heard that gentle threat
you'll shudder in your Kahikatea
clogs, as you walk around
the bogs of Te Wahipounamu -
wouldn't you?