08-07-2017, 12:12 AM
I love the first two stanzas of your poem. The comparison of the past and the present lifestyles is very stark, and the girl's state of mind through it all is very well expressed.
I especially liked the description of the dream.
I found parts of the third paragraphs pretty confusing though. I don't understand the relevance of the washing of clothes. And I don't understand "She got you too, sometimes I
Think worse, right by the fucking wrist." I see that the first girl suspects the second one had it worse, but what is the relevance of the wrist here?
The last stanza is brilliant! Thanks for the read!
I especially liked the description of the dream.
I found parts of the third paragraphs pretty confusing though. I don't understand the relevance of the washing of clothes. And I don't understand "She got you too, sometimes I
Think worse, right by the fucking wrist." I see that the first girl suspects the second one had it worse, but what is the relevance of the wrist here?
The last stanza is brilliant! Thanks for the read!