Mylar/Helium - Edit2

[The Four-Eyed Cat]

Mylar/Helium


Blue five-pointed shiny star                                             This sentence feels a little bit bloated due to the amount of adjectives. perhaps omit 'shiny'?
birthday helium balloon                                           
wrinkled, half-inflated
crosses six busy freeway lanes
low, cat-played
by unsettled crosswinds.                                                    Lovely sentence

Mylar nearly unbiodegradable
can last forever;                                                             "Mylar... ...Forever" feels clunky structurewise. Perhaps swap the word order
helium, like hydrogen                                                       (how i would do it: Nearly unbiodegradable Mylar, Everlasting)
but less so, manages
escape from all confinements.

As between flesh and spirit                                               
material and meme                                                         Meme as in internetmeme? Or is it a chemical term?
which is Mylar and which helium? I have no clue and googling 'meme' will unlikely yield the results i'm looking for haha
Flesh escapes, evanesces,
recycles after giving life
its temporary and declining lift
but meme and spirit
though they rest and tatter
seeming empty or forgotten
nonetheless endure.

Interesting poem. I would expand more on the thought that the birthday balloon a child gets, eventually will outlast that person. I hope that you will agree with the notes i've listed above. Thanks for sharing, Duke!