05-29-2017, 09:06 PM
thanks richard & yahska! crit hit home and will all be carefully thought about for revision.
to richard-- yes, the poem is about children (young adults, to be exact). without context i can see why it would be unclear. as for the last three lines, i'm glad it came off mixed... feared, and fear of- isn't that a teenager in a nutshell?
to yahska-- i am not the narrator. this is more a stylization of all the strange contradictions and pretenses and ticks teenagers have when they become adults too early... in a way, i'm glad you picked up on all the contradictions and things that didn't make sense if you thought about it carefully.
to richard-- yes, the poem is about children (young adults, to be exact). without context i can see why it would be unclear. as for the last three lines, i'm glad it came off mixed... feared, and fear of- isn't that a teenager in a nutshell?
to yahska-- i am not the narrator. this is more a stylization of all the strange contradictions and pretenses and ticks teenagers have when they become adults too early... in a way, i'm glad you picked up on all the contradictions and things that didn't make sense if you thought about it carefully.
like you've been shot (bang bang bang)