We're All Born Knowing All (edit)

[vagabond]

I


Dogs go to heaven,
the preacher must’ve forgot
when he told you otherwise.        "otherwise" would mean that the preacher said dogs don´t go to heaven. but having said that he cannot at the same time have forgotten about his opinion.
if you wanted the preacher to say "only man goes to heaven" you need to make it clearer somehow.


The words burn


a year later
when a boy misses the bus stop
but catches a noose.                          many ways in which this could be interpreted, but which one you intended is unclear.  


Did the clergyman not recognize
the napalm in his breath
when he laid his voice on you—
your own hands can only bring you hell.         are you talking about masturbation or something?


The world burns


before it is the world                
and after.                        yes, maybe, but i don´t see the point of that statement. also if something burns then it IS as well. maybe just write "the world burns before it lives and after" although i then still don´t see a relevance.


II


Ten thousand years preceding
the original poodle            clever lines.     the original poodle.. but there is no such thing, just as well as there is no original man
man steps out of the light
and into his head, 
shutting the blinds.


He didn’t recognize God’s face
in the plateau he pummeled
into jagged nothin’
calling that carcass, first temple.                  man killed god?
                                  
Every moment is a revelation
to a mutt eating biscuits.                 well, i wouldn´t know for sure.

i receive some isolated impressions, but i can´t connect them into something that makes sense as a whole. maybe there is some way you could clarify the poem.