Red Velvet Sunrise

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(I wrote this poem trying to convey a feeling of acceptance and empowerment.)

I am sitting on the roof as the morning stretches blue, sleep away and drags
a red velvet across its shoulders. Everything is smaller than me. I finger the
brick, red and raw like dried blood but it is so far.
          I am becoming. Girl as city.
There are lights. Tarps in windows, curling plants. Streets have cars missing
like teeth, those some already gone off to work or and those some who haven't come home yet
yet. There is a wind that tussles my hair like his hand. Donuts are being sprinkled,
shower curtains drawn back. I am shuddering - not from the cold but from the
hum in my chest. An old song, dizzy in my head, plays; An old man singing from
a mountain to his heart, lost somewhere in the town below
"I am here and it's okay, you can forget about me"

Minor things, but I really like the pacing of it all.  As I was reading I just added things that I would have said to keep the rhythm fluid.

Overall I really like it, very good use of imagery.  Be sure to read your poem aloud at different paces after you've written it.