03-23-2017, 05:20 AM
(03-21-2017, 03:47 AM)Erthona Wrote: Opium is the religion of the massesConfession: did scan the thread up to here first.
The rich throw us under their mill, sub wealthy for rich? hold us trapped between millstones?
indiscriminately grind our flesh & bones, sub thoughtlessly or busily for indiscriminately
yet forbid us poppies to succor sub assuage for succor, though when pronounced "sucker" it does bite
our mental anguish or quite our pitiful moans. "suppress our moans" for "qui(e)t ... moans"?
erthona
©2017
The conceit and title reversal are good. Could perhaps be rewritten more as a demand for (more/legal) drugs than a complaint that they're not legal; also, the religious angle could be stressed ("our persecuted savior, Opium") or the like.
Non-practicing atheist