Rewind (Revision)

[Todd]

With your fork, you remove
food from your mouth, and like an artist
reconstruct the unchewed almond-crusted salmon

With a fork, you remove
food from your mouth,
and like a conductor reconstruct
the medley of unchewed  almond-crusted salmon

Here's why I prefer the artist version:

I get the movement of the hand/fork, then the stop to think about how she is like an artist, then the salmon becomes tiny shards, the way fish flakes, needing to be refit together like a mosaic into a filet.

The conductor version focuses more on the hand/fork motion by elongating it into baton movements and then interrupts reconstruction/salmon with medley, a whole other line of thought, clutter for me. It's interesting and well written but for me the poem loses some immediacy.

I don't think surgeon suits her state of mind, maybe his, but not hers. I hope this helps.

Thanks for wading back into the fray. I get what your saying and artist is still an option. These are all just possibilities, little parallel universes collapsing with each choice. The way I'm looking at it, everything is from the perspective of the speaker. he isn't truly able to understand her point of view, only interpret her reactions. When he is enchanted by the rewind than she is an artist or a conductor. When he is morbid and worried she is a coroner. When he is too caught up and views the process as clinical he sees her as a surgeon. When it seems to mysterious perhaps she is an archeologist or anthropologist. We still learn more about him from the choice and we really no nothing about her. His gaze and perspective is actually very restrictive. 

Your other point shows the strength of artist and possibly archeologist and the like. If the word can stand alone and resists the need for any flourishes than it becomes more immediate and yes that is a strength. Like with everything it is a series of tradeoffs.

I appreciate your perspective on this, Ella.

Best,

Todd