The Nuisance of Heart
#5
I think in your current arrangement the choice is either cut the pipes or leave them exactly where they are. I'm not sure there's a better placement for them in the poem.

I was 50/50 on suggesting cutting when I was reading but came to a place of acceptance with the section.
The secret of poetry is cruelty.--Jon Anderson
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Messages In This Thread
The Nuisance of Heart - by baifan - 03-13-2017, 03:50 PM
RE: The Nuisance of Heart - by ellajam - 03-13-2017, 07:16 PM
RE: The Nuisance of Heart - by Todd - 03-14-2017, 01:39 AM
RE: The Nuisance of Heart - by baifan - 03-14-2017, 03:51 AM
RE: The Nuisance of Heart - by Todd - 03-14-2017, 05:37 AM
RE: The Nuisance of Heart - by baifan - 03-14-2017, 08:44 AM
RE: The Nuisance of Heart - by Todd - 03-15-2017, 01:24 AM



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