03-07-2017, 03:10 PM
Why is he scared of his demons?
It's a little repetitive about the open and closed eyes. Try grabbing a thesaurus and mixing it up a little.
Try shortening some lines to keep your meter flowing smoother.
They play a movie of all the things I've done. --> I am tortured with my past.
You have a good idea here, just revise. Good work.
It's a little repetitive about the open and closed eyes. Try grabbing a thesaurus and mixing it up a little.
Try shortening some lines to keep your meter flowing smoother.
They play a movie of all the things I've done. --> I am tortured with my past.
You have a good idea here, just revise. Good work.