Sometimes, a star is born

[Lizzie]

Achebe,

Gorgeous piece. I agree with ellajam about the open ended nature of the last line being a plus.

I only wish that 'splat' came at the very end of line 5, like it stopped the line with its force. Even though you're looking for that end rhyme, when I read the line with splat at the end, the sonics still correlate between 'flies' and 'hies.'

Or maybe you could just set 'splat' off by itself.

But, again, lovely piece.

Cheers,

Lizzie