Show at Bowser Brewery

[bestoweroflight]

I like the idea of this poem alot, but i think it needs a bit more work to sparkle. First, i think you need to clarify who "you" is in your poem. Is it the regulars at Bowser? is it a newcomer? or maybe its the band manager. Regardless, i think if you decide upon that, your second step would be creating the rhythm of your poem, producing the environment that the reader is sitting in, take your reader the backstage before a gig. Hope my advice helps, even just a little!

Ya Hagh
Bestoweroflight