Walkabout - Edit

[mrweiner]

In the pet store, her eyes  The comma here breaks my engagement off the top. Maybe something like "Her pet store eyes."
were like a puppies
before it’s given a treat.

Unless I'm somehow misreading, I really feel like the plural "puppies" should be the possessive "puppy's." To expand on @Ambrosial Revelations comment on the cliche of puppy dog eyes, this could also be sidestepped by keeping "puppies" and changing the rest of the context, as in something like:

In the pet store, her eyes 
were like puppies
before they're given treats.

It was November,
and the ground was wet
from last nights rain.

This feels like the weakest stanza in context, although it's fine on its own. This is the only stanza that does not concern itself with "her". Why is that? Could be stronger if something happened here instead if it just acting as a description of the area.

Outside a coffee house
a busker played Hank Williams,
and she gave him a cigarette
in lieu of change.

Great imagery, her. The fourth line stanza here breaks the feel of the poem for me a bit. Maybe drop the last line, and use something like "and she tipped him a cigarette"

When we got to the park,
she said some trees look better
without their leaves.

This is a really nice insight into "her" mind and I like it because the anecdote is relatable for me, but again to reference @ambrosial's thoughts: I'm not sure if I feel enough connection to her to know why this is notable. Maybe another stanza that gives some insight into her having worthwhile observation, or why what she says is meaningful to you.