Freedom to Love (a wedding poem)

[BrandonKerns]

**Thanks in advance for reading my poem. This is to read out at a wedding in a couple of weeks. I have not written in years so constructive feedback very welcome!**

Today is a perfect day
When two hearts intertwine as they may
Tis’ the beginning of an everlasting journey Agreed. Remove Tis' completely or change to it's
And the freedom of love shines its beauty Maybe add will or now between love and shine(s)

Standing in glorious oneness
Oh, thank the Lord for his greatness
For bringing perfect souls down a painted path As to the other comment by ellajam, maybe For bringing broken souls down a perfect path
From creating life through to the aftermath I see what you are trying to get at but this line is a little confusing, as aftermath is the consequences after an unpleasant event (referring to the fall?). You have built up beauty rather than focusing on their brokenness so aftermath doesn't seem to fit here.

Unravelling every layer of the rose to the warmth of the sun delete every add layers maybe. but fine as it is
Caressing every cell, infusing with protection and serenity agreed cell isn't very romantic. infused instead of infusing.
Fresh dew touching the petals without fear of vulnerability each petal is more precise than the petals.
It is time to just be

Swirling through every colour of the rainbow (lots of every already from lines above) 
Drifting through clouds, being carried with godly hands down a waterfall Godly hands down a waterfall - lots of imagery that doesn't fit here
Moments without hope for more than what they already are
Dreams do come true

May you dance with your children
Let the world see your wholeness
Let the joys and sorrows make you stronger

May your dreams interweave full of colour and beauty
Let love be the gentle breeze 
Let it cleanse and wash your soul

May you honour and respect each other's individuality. 
May your love glisten and shine and glow to the skies.
Be proud, be brave, be strong with humility.
May you both become one

The back half is solid. Overall you have created a great poem that suits the occasion. Nobody there will be an expert poet and I'm sure all will enjoy this. Just a few word changes and you ought to be good.