Living with Carpenter Bees

[Sparkydashforth]

Super edit JM, I will definitely make some changes.
Good eyes.

Thanks!

I like the way you show living things in relation to each other, and awareness of your place there.


They are dug in For me, the verb 'to be' is passive. 'They dug themselves in' makes the opening of your poem more active, more inviting.
under the screen door
where my foot swings,
where concrete crumbles.

Fat and fuzzy
the bees scurry
as heavy as baby mice. I like all these descriptors.
They share an apartment
with a chipmunk,
and a long black centipede
that sometimes emerges Don't think you need to qualify here
to ripple-wave at something
only it can see. Love this

The bees skim a small acreage;
rotund whirring blimps.
meandering low. Punctuation
A pair will often chase each other
in a circle of sunlight. Love the image; if you make it in present tense this image is much more immediate.

When night drips from the roof,
we share a living space
made from unpacked shadows. Strong finish