Lagopus Edit 1 Everyone

[tectak]

Lagopus

Lagopus lagopus scotica,
chuckles at shortening days. -- this I don't get.  What's he got to be happy about, unless he's ignorant?  Or unless he thinks it's pretty grouse fun to be running from death...
Winter is coming but so are the guns… -- perhaps you'd consider "winter comes, but so do the guns"
Blat blat blat, through  heather-hushed heath, -- the alliteration works nicely as a quiet contrast to the onomatopoeia, but you also get the rush of air from the "h" which is almost onomatopoeia itself -- very clever
echoing down in the valley beneath, 
filling the wind with knots in air. -- I had to read this line a few times to get the image straight, but it's all good now
Sky-line beaters  black on grey, -- is the extra space deliberate?
bent to the rain, halooing away,
Lagopus lagopus scotica,
this will be your last day. -- for meter, I'm not so keen on this line.  It's a half-beat short, or a half-beat long, and I think I'd shorten it for effect.  Even just "this is" could fix it.  

There are a couple of things that confuse me about the poem, but then I've never seen/participated in a grouse hunt so I am probably missing subtleties.  I gather there are beaters ahead of the hunt to flush the birds out -- this is fairly clear and nicely illustrated.  What I don't quite get is the "chuckles" bit, and whether it is the "last day" for the species (i.e. are they endangered by hunting/ climate change?) or just this one unlucky chortler?  

Otherwise, the heath is quite alive beneath the (always) grey sky, with the ubiquitous drizzle -- I suppose in such conditions it's rather a relief to be able to shoot something.

Hi leanne,
Thank you. Just one thing you should know. The grouse laughs, chuckles, giggles. It is an unforgettable call...a cackle. The shortening days is a double entendre....winter solstice AND the shooting season!
Just had a few hours on the blasted heath...this was it. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=zfgFY-hgiOk
Best,
tectak
(I will edit..it is uncooked right now)