Adelaide Spring [Edit]
#2
Having a little trouble critiquing this merely because -- as I'm sure you know -- it's bugger-all to do with the wind turbines and all to do with a once-in-a-century storm beating the crap out of power lines. Storms would have just as little regard for fossil fuel-generated electricity, regardless of which agency Barnaby Joyce is cuddled up to at the moment.

I am not sure about the volta on the recurrence of "teens". The connotation shifts but I am not convinced the shift is strong enough to support the turn, particularly as they're both resting on similes (the weaker, more needy cousin of the metaphor family). I won't speak to the misuse of "hurricanes" simply because this need not stand for the single event but may well translate into other situations. Well, that is if WA and Qld ever get over their affair with coal, since they're the states most likely to be subject to actual hurricanes.

I do like the rhymes here, especially use/juice, and the couplet is pretty cool.
It could be worse
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Messages In This Thread
Adelaide Spring [Edit] - by dukealien - 10-06-2016, 06:04 AM
RE: Adelaide Spring - by Leanne - 10-06-2016, 06:49 AM
RE: Adelaide Spring - by Achebe - 10-06-2016, 06:55 AM
RE: Adelaide Spring - by dukealien - 10-06-2016, 09:31 AM
RE: Adelaide Spring - by Leanne - 10-06-2016, 07:55 AM
RE: Adelaide Spring [Edit] - by dukealien - 10-07-2016, 11:47 PM
RE: Adelaide Spring [Edit] - by Achebe - 10-28-2017, 07:32 AM
RE: Adelaide Spring [Edit] - by dukealien - 10-28-2017, 12:11 PM
RE: Adelaide Spring [Edit] - by Achebe - 10-28-2017, 12:42 PM



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