10-04-2016, 07:16 AM
Very fun little poem.
There was one weird thing though. The first two lines in each stanza have a lovely little rhythm to them, then the third does almost the same but with one extra syllable each time. I'd knock out the "your" before "intoxication" and "incarceration" to make the third line really jive with the first two.
Also,
Add some habits, happy accident, have-at-its, and be done!
I love this line. Such a silly Dr. Seussian take on a DUI test
There was one weird thing though. The first two lines in each stanza have a lovely little rhythm to them, then the third does almost the same but with one extra syllable each time. I'd knock out the "your" before "intoxication" and "incarceration" to make the third line really jive with the first two.
Also,
Add some habits, happy accident, have-at-its, and be done!
I love this line. Such a silly Dr. Seussian take on a DUI test