Travel Dream (new edit 2)

[Wjames]

TRAVEL DREAM

Television prison lights the living room,
the shackles of the sofa,
a nature show on mute,
 
drifting away into sleep,
quiet current,
the only sound, the voiceless tone of quiet. I don't think the last two lines are necessary, I get that it's quiet by the show being on mute, and the narrator falling asleep. This sentence is very strange for me to read, each line seems rhythmically (and grammatically) disconnected from the next. I would never say something like this when trying to communicate with someone, and that's what a poem is trying to do, isn't it? The central image of the stanza is pretty nice though. I.e if this were my poem, I would adjust it to something like:

Television prison lights the living room
as I'm chained in the shackles of the sofa,
drifting to sleep with a nature show on mute.


The wind blows ‘qw.’
‘I’ am in the middle.
The ‘e’ is the water beside me.
The ‘t’ is the tap of tree branches. I would cut these 4 sentences - it is convoluted imo, and I can't come up with a clear image from it at all.
I stretch my arms and legs,
--left foot in N. America,
right foot in S. America,
left arm in Europe,
right arm in Africa,
summersault into Asia,
flip up and land in Australia—
a little dirt from every land dusted on my face,
sweat in every country,
piss in every ocean,
shit the food of every people,
Siberia, Sahara,
Chile, Canada, I like this section.
to finally shout an answer
to calling global corners, If the global corners are "calling" as in, you want to visit these places, you can't really "shout an answer" - the only answer to the call would be to travel. If that's what you meant, I would simplify these two lines. (i.e: to finally answer the calling global corners, or something like that).
but only finding quiet,
then longing for the moon,
 
then waking to a science show, I would change "then" in this line to "and" - you just used "then" in the preceding line, might as well change it up as it doesn't alter the meaning.
television muted.  

I think you could make this one better with a quick edit. Hopefully my thoughts help you out a bit.