The Sallman Head -- edit 3

[Lizzie]

Thanks for your input Kole! I appreciate you taking time for my pieces. I'll consider your thoughts and see if there's anything I can change.

lizziep

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Lizz,

I think you did a wonderful revision and the work takes a much better form. The original extended beyond itself in a few areas but I have to admit I preferred the S1 of the original a little better. Of course, as the first version progressed S1 did seem a bit out of place.

Good work Lizz
Enjoyed reading

Luna

Thanks for reading, Luna! Yes, I think that the original first line was a good hook, but it became more confusing over time. It was a trade-off.

lizziep