It's True, The Earth Is Flat edit 1 (Tiger, Tom, Achebe)

[ellajam]

Thanks you so much, P, for taking the time to read and comment. I was hoping for L5/6 to be a lead-in to the whine which I was hoping would come across as more personal, I will see if I can do that better. Thanks for the thumbs up on the enjambment, I don't do it successfully too often.

You are not the first to not see the connection I am aiming at between the boomerang and stepping off (I was not thinking airplane). I can tell you why I am reluctant to let it go although my explanation, of course, will do nothing to help the poem. Julia Sweeney did a great piece called God Said Ha, it is hilariously heartbreaking. I have watched people struggle to die and she describes her brother's struggle. They brought someone in who had him picture himself on a trampoline, up down up down, then they suggested he just move to the side. He died. The poem is trying to say life is not an unending cycle we are caught in without the control to step out of it, but a path that rightly ends, even though human suffering is so acute it has them dreaming otherwise.

I will see if there is something I can do in the middle that makes the opening and ending come together better. I appreciate you letting me know it isn't quite working.