Vietnamese Traffic - Edit 1

[mitsuch]

Living in India, I completely understand the pains of crowded streets, however I wasn't able to visualise anything that I haven't already seen, and as other people have said there was no uniqueness to the poem. It seems very generic. I will provide some input below, however I am in no means highly qualified to be doing so, but here is my review -

It’s rainy season, and the streets are clogged - From the beginning to the end, the wording is very plain. For me, using better wording, such as "Down pours the rain, clogging the winding, slim streets" would be something more inviting and grasping. That was just off the top of my head, not well written at all.
with mopeds, puddles, and the violent shrieks - Use of the word "the" here isn't required. Cuts from the flow. And also the continuity of a sentence with no segments onto the next line is not done well. Needs to improve.
of passing horns. My glasses are so fogged - Again this entire sentence can be written more evocatively.
I can’t see past the man in front of me,
so I follow as we run through a red
and swerve to merge with the turning masses.

The truck behind me honks to say I’d best
evacuate the lane, or wind up sprawled
across the road like bugs on a windshield. - The ending simile was a let down, as Leanne pointed out. It seems to be a sore thumb and very cliched so it does not add anything of value to the poem. finding a more unique simile would help.

Thanks for the read.