My Spaceship

[Quixilated]

Hi Beck,

Lovely poem. It reminds me of all those children's stories where the kids turn the world around them into an elaborate imagined story land. I feel like you could take it a little deeper, push a bit further, but I like where it's going. Just a few notes below.

--Quix

The upstairs room feels like a spaceship. I think going full metaphor here would have more impact, "my upstairs room is a spaceship" we know it's imagination, no one's room is actually a spaceship, so why not jump in with both feet? The more the narrator believes the picture, the easier it will be to take us with you.
A vessel to conduct my extracurricular endeavors
that will take me anywhere:
to Malaysia
or Alaska.
to save my sick mother This line is a problem. It is either the secret reason for the entire poem, or it should not be here. It makes the reader stop and wonder how sick? The word "save" makes me think she's dying, in which case this poem is way more serious than originally thought. Does the narrator need this escape because things are so bad? The audience will reanalyze the entire poem simply because of this line. If it IS the entire point of the poem, then that is exactly what you want them to do, but put it below the Whitman line for full impact. If it is not, then it is too distracting, and should be removed.
or explore the inner workings of Walt Whitman's mind.
 
I've entered a ship with the windows closed.Assuming the sick mother is the undercurrent of the poem, then I picture here the gearing up and preparing is all to face this situation, a coping mechanism, wanting to help but needing to get himself/herself together first. However, even without that, it is easy to picture a child who has made of his/her room a sanctuary of sorts, a place to cope with life in general before facing it again.
That contains all my gear for anything or anywhere.
Mental preparedness and physical appropriation
to make it happen. to make what happen? If you intend to leave it vague, perhaps say "make things happen" as in, in general. If this has all been gearing up to make one specific thing happen, then we might need another clue hidden somewhere in the poem. Or is the contentedness in the next line what is being made to happen?
 
I'm here with a feeling of inspired contentedness.
This is my place.
I'm ready.
 
 
I think I'll go downstairs...