05-15-2016, 06:04 AM
(05-15-2016, 01:43 AM)bedeep Wrote: A Way to Go
I want waterfeet
to walk this burning world
(where are the frogs?)
marshes seethe,
sedges grasses forbs blaze up, Had to look forbs up. I wonder about this, you cover sedges, grasses and non grass plants...seems wordy
tall forests fall to fiery ground trees on fire might fall, but "forests" falling is a little awkward
birds drop sizzling from seared horizons Again close but you can't reach or drop from a horizon, although the sizzling seared part is nice
(where went the fishes, the cool mosses?)
mouth wind-blistered
skin spark-stung I watch
as streams crackle and steam...
where are the frogs?
-- the frogs who call
the rain --
they are burning. Poor frogs.
with little hope
I pray over my bluest socks
all night long and in the morning
put them on
still wet
and start walking. Nice ending images; disturbing overall. Staying still overnight where there is such a conflagration is iffy, is there a safe place? is that something worthwhile to incorporate if so?
(Been a dry spell since NaPM; this was sparked haha by the Fort McMurray fire in Canada and by my blue socks. I wonder if my title needs improvement; they often do. Open to your wisdom elsewise also, and thanks.)

