whoa to wickedness

[Lizzie]

If you do choose to go with the "Woe" version while you're re-writing, it would combine well with the pillar of sand reference about Lot's wife. It could develop an almost prophetic-warning tone that I think would be interesting. I love Biblical references and imagery. But, I agree that the person being warned was not obvious, if that's what you were going for.

Also, at the risk of being contrary, I also am a big fan of angst (if it's done well). I'm a huge fan of Sylvia Plath's "Lady Lazarus" which is just rife with angst. Personal preference.