04-21-2016, 08:53 AM
Love the imagery with the lines about wild trees bare of leaves.. however I'm not sure about that 'seems like insomniacs'. To me, this seems a bit too deliberate. Let your audience figure it out, I knew that's what you meant with those two previous lines before you spelled it out. Perhaps come in with something relating it to your narrator/self... and less direct. "as restless as I" or something along those lines.
That's about all the feedback I have. Brand new to the forum so still learning the ropes but I found it very solid. Bravo.
That's about all the feedback I have. Brand new to the forum so still learning the ropes but I found it very solid. Bravo.